The Value of Stillness

Photo: Unsplash | Zoltan Tasi
there is not a single circumstance 
of challenge or regret we face 
that cannot be improved 
by our stillness

The main cause of your distress, your frustration and your unhappiness is because of your expectations and how unrealistic they are.

We have expectations of ourselves and our lives, which lead us to believe irrational things about perfection and safety.

Inside of each of us, our psyches, there is the Child, the Animal, the Protector and the Judge. The Child wants freedom, the animal wants its needs met, the Protector wants to keep us safe and the Judge wants everything to be fair. When we encounter pain and discomfort, and we are not present in self-leadership and stillness, the shadow side of our psychology triggers the wounded child, the Beast, the Protector becomes the Critic and the Judge becomes the Victim. The missing mediator is you: Your still and loving Self.


There is nothing in life that is not improved by increased perspective and stillness. To be curious and present in the face of tragedy, pain, regret or fear, requires great vulnerability and great courage, but you cannot grow and heal without those key aspects and the chosen stance to embody them: Curiosity, Presence, Vulnerability and Courage.

Growth and Healing are two sides of the same coin. Most of our lives and our identities are a fiction. Most of what troubles us is a drama of events that have passed, and something which may yet happen, both of which we imagine a much more dramatic version of in our heads.

Stillness is a choice. Courage is a choice. Presence is a habit. Vulnerability is a choice.

We are who we repeatedly Choose to be.

Your stance will determine what next year looks like, not your circumstance.

Do you still really believe that your life is just happening to you, or are you waking up to the reality that it is and always was, happening FOR you.

“This world was made, to be free in.” – David Whyte

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